Bombs Away

If you back away they only come closer.
I'm not going to take all these things into consideration.
For once I’m going to act on impulse.
Heavy books make heavy eyelids
At my age I'm not supposed to have these lines.
But I do.
And like my mother ill take pride in them.
Growing up fast wasn't so bad I guess.
At least the hardest part is over.
It still brings me to tears.
Thread won't hold the seams forever.
You know the feeling when you’re about to get sick?
That first wave of discomfort, that feeling that's so familiar that you are able to diagnose yourself.
It's like that,
But with no hopes of a remedy.
It's feeling sick but in all the places you've never felt sick before.
But enough about that,
It's not going to bring him back.
I get it. I get it. He's gone.
Enough is enough.
But If this building were to collapse at least I know I've got someone to meet me at the gate.
Everyone runs around like the sky is falling ignoring the fact that one day it really will. So live while you can.
There will be plenty of reasons to worry later.
I am definitely my mother’s daughter.
And proud to be at that.
Sometimes it seems she's all I've got.
It scares the hell out of me.
With dry cheeks I can lie.
But with wet ones it's a dead give away.
So I'll just carry around a handkerchief.
No one will ever know.

Southern Boys

Oh those southern boys.
What gentlemen they are.
And with a little southern comfort, their sweeter than pie.
It's the substance that is so familiar.
Not the city.
It affects me the same way wherever I am.
You’re probably going assume that you’re the meaning for the next line.
But you’re not.
You’re the line after that.
You were stuck in your head there for a minute.
But I waited out the storm.
We talked about love the other night.
And how complicated it all really is.
We talked about what all the fuss is about.
Swearing to never fall hard like the fools, only to call ourselves hypocrites.
You love me more.
But only because your better at lying.

Focus

Finally. I'm back in my skin.
But the constant noise is getting to me.
I’m ready for the silence.
At this point in time, it’s harder to tune things out than it ever has been before.
I’ll be frank.
No matter who decides to soak in my words.
Even when you’re drenched, I’ll say what I need to say, not what you want to hear.
And I'll close the blinds in hopes I might sleep in.
That way maybe time will go by faster.
The only problem with that is, when I wake up, that familiar taste seeps back into my mouth.
Guilt.
But so far, so good.
Dreams are only dreams.
I'll save the best for last.
I practically ignored November.
But I guess that’s a good thing.
It’s the hardest month of the year anyway.
I just don’t like to feel numb.
I’d rather feel every sentiment in the world than to feel nothing at all.
It proves I’m still human.
In a place like this it’s easy to forget.
Thank you December.
Maybe you can help me make sense of all this.